If it's FREE, why won't I take it EVERYTIME?

I love consignment shopping, garage sale-ing, and well, I'm not to proud to admit ~I asked the backdoor neighbor for the sand he was hauling away for my backyard beach! FREE stuff is like blessings from above! God knows my needs, (okay, and wants!) and they just show up! Really?!

No...even the $5 victorian rugs I nabbed at a garage sale last week weren't just "lucky" treasures! They were God gifts! God showing me that He gets how much I love pink and vintage and well, "Happy Friday"! Love, God  ....as if written on a gift card from Him!

So, if it's that easy for me to see Him in these little gifts of the everyday, and recognize that the people He brings into my life are not "coincidences", but a part of my journey, even more precious gifts, and I accept them, anxiously, even joyously...why is so difficult to accept His gift of Grace?

Grace is FREE, just like the stuff, but yet I hesitate, doubt, walk away...like it's not "good enough". But I know, in my heart that it's not the gift, the grace, that's not good enough. It's me, who doesn't feel worthy of receiving His FREE gift. Look at how many times I've failed, disappointed, hurt Him and those I love...how could I possibly accept such a precious gift?

The things, even though I know they're from Him, are just that...things. But grace. Grace cost my Jesus His life. He gave it willingly for me. Took my sin and shame and bore it on the Cross. How can I possibly take this uncomprehensible, indescribable gift that I've done nothing to deserve?

Because He loves me. He died for me so that I would receive it. He doesn't pull back His Hand even when I fail again, disappoint, again, cause hurt, again. He opens wide His Arms, reaches out His Hands and draws me to Himself, holds me, and offers me His FREE gift of Grace, again.

So I am reminded, that to reject grace is to reject God. My precious Savior, Creator, Redeemer and Gift-giver, Who gave His life for me. He only asks that I open my hands and receive His Gift of Grace, because He loves me.

Borrowing...Thank you, Arianne for your post. I hope you don't mind my sharing...

It’s OK to Not Be OK
May 22, 2013 01:20 am | Arianne

Hey friend? Come sit next to me here on my old thrifted couch. I have a warm, soothing cup with your name on it and I want to tell you a few things.
Are you looking at that overflowing to do list and feeling bad about yourself?
Are you thinking of the week ahead and wondering how you will handle all of it?
Are you watching the news with your heart breaking and wondering how to take it all in, when your own daily life is so overwhelming already?
Here’s the thing: It’s ok to not be ok.
Right now?
Where you are at is ok.

It might not feel like it, and it might not look like it to the rest of the world, but I can tell you confidently that you are ok. And not because you have anything pulled together.
Let me tell you why.
Because Jesus says you are worthy.
Even when you don’t accomplish a single thing (yet again) today, you are still worthy. Even when you just survived today. Even when you’ve forgotten how to thrive. You are still worthy.
He is not ashamed to be called your God. He wants your healing and your redemption and for your broken to be whole – and he will take you there. On your own journey. He is so faithful.
You know how I know?
You see, I get you, because you are me sometimes. And I can look back at the darkness behind me and realize it wasn’t as dark as I had once thought. It had bright spots shining in when I wasn’t looking. Maybe when I was looking down instead of up.
And those lights are what drew me to the next step. And the next. And the next. One foot at a time, just doing the next thing.
A month from now, you won’t be where you are today. Because all things are in either growth or decline, for the glory of the Lord, you won’t be where you are right now. Nothing is static. Because you are worthy, and ok, you can choose tomorrow what one thing you will accomplish. Then next week maybe you’ll find two things. Even if those two things are washing a load of laundry and then putting it away.
When the expectations of the world are beating at the door and all you can do is pretend you aren’t home, just know that even if you don’t feel ok, you are ok. And tomorrow you can walk towards that door. And the day after that you can unlock it. And the day after that maybe you’ll open it.
But right now, you don’t have to be productive. You don’t have to be on time. You don’t have to be organized or pulled together or stylish or smart or lovely at all. You can just be you and you can just love Jesus.
That is enough for today.